FOOD JAIL: TO CURE FOOD ADDICTIONS
Dr. Miriam Adahan
A recent survey showed that almost 85% of girls age 13-25 suffer from food addictions – anorexia, bulimia or obesity. When people are bored or stressed, food is often the most handy “mother substitute” and source of quick pleasure. Over-eating is not necessarily a sign of deep psychological problems. After all, most dogs are also overweight today! Every cell in our bodies contains thousands of opiate receptors, driving us to seek pleasure. If we don’t satisfy this need in a positive manner, we are likely to end up either medicated or addicted.
The food industry bombards us with “Eat More” messages while the fashion industry tells us, “Fat Is Failure.” The need for love and attention is so great that many women will harm themselves to win a slice of that pie. Thus, if 4 inch high heels is “in”, that’s what women will wear, even if they will suffer from painful bunions and back aches for the rest of their lives. If we lived in a society which viewed “beauty” as a matter of elongated lips, ears and necks, we’d be destroying our cervical discs by wearing as many necklaces as possible and undergoing painful procedures to put metal plates in our ears and lips!
Never mind that most fashion models are manipulated by handlers who achieve that look by hooking them on drugs, both legal and illegal. To an innocent youth, it looks like they’re having the most fun and getting the most attention. When we look longingly at the heavenly creations at the Viennese table, do we listen to the “thin = success” or the “sugar = love” messages in our brains? The choice isn’t always easy. If you have a food addiction, the following ideas may help you.
PUT YOURSELF IN A LOVE JAIL! Child abusers are put behind bars, since they cannot be trusted to control their impulses. All addictions are abusive. These habits often go back to childhood, when harmful behaviors became substitutes for loving attention or successful accomplishment. But now, as adults, lack of discipline is a betrayal of your “Inner Child,” who needs you to be a wise, responsible adult! Prisoners have discipline forced on them; they must awaken, exercise, work and go to sleep at the same hour each day. See yourself as a strict but caring jailor as well as a prisoner in need of impulse-control! Don’t confuse “discipline” with deprivation and abuse. It’s the key to health, sanity and stability! Have set meal times. Eat the same amount and perhaps even the same foods at a specific time each day until you prove that you are a trustworthy adult. The body is like a dog; when it gets used to being fed at a certain time each day, it won’t “bark” to be fed all day. You’ll have to be in a “love jail” until you learn to cope with anger, loneliness, failure, rejection, sadness and anxiety without becoming self-abusive. Keep asking, “Do I want sweets or self-respect, sanity and stability?” You can’t have both!
IDENTIFY THE TROUBLE TIMES: What triggers a binge?
When I get angry, like the time ____________________
When I feel sad and disappointed, like the time when ______________________
When I am bored and don’t know what to do with myself, like ________
When I want to reward myself for having been “good” and sticking to my diet by being bad and going off my diet ________________
Now, PLAN AHEAD to face these times without the “comfort” of food. Find pleasurable alternatives, such as chesed projects or aerobic exercise.
FEEL YOUR FEELINGS FEARLESSLY: Identify the feelings that you try to stuff down with food, such as: boredom, loneliness, rejection, emptiness, self-hatred. As children, these feelings seemed very frightening and overwhelming, especially if no one helped you deal with them in a positive manner. But now you are an adult and can learn new skills. Practice “witnessing” your feelings without fear, blame, guilt or shame. To lessen the intensity of your feelings and bolster self-acceptance, the Emotional Freedom Technique (www.emofree.com) is very helpful.
RAISE YOUR SEROTONIN LEVEL: We need high levels of Vitamin B and serotonin, a neurotransmitter which stabilizes moods. When a kalla is planning her wedding and feeling ecstatic, she produces high levels of serotonin, eats less and sees life as wondrous and exciting. We, too, can raise our serotonin level by finding fulfilling activities and doing aerobic exercises for at least 40 minutes a day. Plan for these “high” activities at the times you are most likely to binge or purge so that you’ll be too busy to do so. And make sure you eat a diet rich in Vitamin B!
AVOID JUNK FOODS: Processed foods, fried foods and foods with chemicals all harm your liver, which is the major producer of serotonin, making self-control more difficult. Yes, you do feel high for a few minutes after you eat sweets, but you pay a big price by plunging downward when your insulin level jumps. Diet drinks contain chemicals which lower your serotonin level! So stay away from them. The following factors lower vitamin B levels: sleep-deprivation (less than 7 hours), antiobiotics, lack of protein, critical people, white flour/sugar, alcohol and caffeine.
GIVE UP MAGICAL THINKING: Children believe there are “quick fixes” – a magic pill, a loving person or a major life change – that will free them from having to work hard to achieve results. Charlatans earn billions by capitalizing on this childish belief, which we all have to some degree. In truth, the basis of self-esteem is self-discipline. Yes, we need to feel “high,” but that need must be satisfied with chesed projects and fulfilling work. When you are dependent on external sources of love, you often end up bitter and disappointed, which makes addictive behavior seem justified.
AVOID DIETS: Most people gain weight on diets, because they are hungry. Hunger causes the stomach to secrete a hormone called greleen, making you ravenous and causing you to eat more. Also, if you get less than 7 hours sleep, your leptin level will rise, which also increases your appetite. And your metabolism slows when you diet, so you need to eat even less to maintain your weight. Will power won’t be enough to control these factors. No one has will power 24/7. When you are tired, angry or hurt, you will be tempted to eat more to soothe the pain of having been on a diet. You will think, “Just this once, and then I’ll be satisfied.” That never happens. There is NO WAY TO SATISFY AN ADDICTION. You must make a life-long commitment to eating in a disciplined manner, learning to enjoy healthy foods and to enjoy being healthy. If you manage to stick to your plan even if you’re feeling stressed or unloved, your self-confidence will grow.
I suggest using a white powder called Stevia in herbal tea to give you a feeling of sweetness throughout the day. Or make milk-yogurt shakes with Stevia, which has no chemicals or calories. Frozen, it’s like ice cream. You only need a tiny amount. It may take a bit of getting used to, but it’s worth the effort to gain stability and sanity and save you from diabetes, dementia, heart disease and high blood pressure.
Finally, join a support group! Mental health is an inside job. It takes work! But you don’t have to do this alone.
[Most charity organizations give a maximum of 20% to the people they are raising money for. Because THE ADAHAN FUND FOR THE POOR has no office expenses, all contributions are given directly to those who need it most. Donations can be sent to: 2700 W. Chase, Chicago, Il. 60645. For a private appointment, call me at 011-972-2-5868201. Also, Dr. Michal Hochberg, ofBaltimore, uses EFT, a technique which is very helpful for addictions. Call her at 410-358-1466.]